No Regrets
by Vault08
Summary: Garrus reflects on the past two years of his life as they approach the Omega 4 Relay. Originally was going to have this as a collection of Garrus one shots and drabbles, we'll see how this does.


It had been so long since he'd felt like he was doing good.

Sitting alone in the main battery room, his back against the wall and arms folded across his chest, Garrus Vakarian was running through the last few years in his mind, how he'd helped Shepard in the fight against Sovereign, how he'd been victorious, and recognized along Shepard and the crew, they were heroes for those first few weeks, and as they'd been sent to wipe out the remaining pockets of Geth, everything was going right for the Turian, he was preparing to reapply for spectre candidacy, Shepard's words of doing things the way they had to be done, getting the job done how you wanted, not following the book every moment and contemplating how to handle any given situation, had more than reignited his interest in becoming one of the galaxy's very few upholders of justice, and with no limits, Garrus could do exactly what he needed to to get the job done. His coordination was perfectly set.

But then, everything fell apart.

It shattered Garrus's world when he'd heard the news of Shepard's death. He'd been on the first escape pod, sure Shepard wasn't far behind. It hit him square in the gut, and he spent months trying to figure out what to do next. Suddenly, reapplying to be a candidate for the spectres wasn't something so appealing, he wandered the Citadel aimlessly, he had no idea what to do with his life, or how to make it worth something. Joining C-Sec against would just repeat the vicious cycle of him hating his job and wanting to do more, but he had to do something.

As Garrus recalled all these memories, he moved to sit down on one of the crates. They were steadily approaching the Omega-4 relay, and for once, Garrus was back to feeling like he was alright. There was a seemingly imminent death awaiting for Shepard and his crew, but Garrus would follow Shepard blindly, trusting the human to do exactly what was right, he had nothing but faith in Shepard, and believed 100% he knew what he was doing, even if it meant laying down his life working for an organization considered to be terroristic.

Garrus exhaled deeply as he began recalling when he'd first started putting his own team together, trying to stop crime in the less-than-legal way, but he didn't care, he was at a loss, he had to do some good, or else he was bound to fall into a hopeless pit. He gathered 12 of the best men he could find, the least of which wasn't Sidonis, God how he'd trusted Sidonis, he seemed determined and strong-willed, very akin to Garrus, he'd come from a shady background, but was trying to do some good in this galaxy of deception.

Sidonis had saved Garrus more than once, and for a while Garrus trusted Sidonis nearly as much as Shepard, which was saying a lot, he hardly trusted anyone, after seeing how horrid the galaxy can be, to trust someone was a large step for the Turian, he trusted all of his team, but Sidonis the most.

The horror he experienced when he was given the false lead by Sidonis and returned to find his team dead struck him dead-center, and he collapsed with grief. The person he'd trusted had screwed him over, sold information to mercenary groups, gotten his team killed, and left Garrus a vegeance-seeking wreck.

After the initial discovery, Garrus grieved no more, he had only only purpose to be alive anymore, put a bullet in Sidonis's head and several more, make that bastard pay for what he did, for betraying all of them. No, maybe Garrus would torture him first, strap him to a chair and break all of his bones, make that shallow bastard suffer at his hands.

Except that day never came.

Garrus tried tracking Sidonis down with what little credits he had, but it was to no avail. Suddenly, the Turian was back to square one, just like when he'd lost Shepard, he'd lost his greatest friend and his mentor, and now he'd been betrayed by Sidonis, and no matter how much he tried to find him, the trail went cold. Garrus refused to fall into a pit of depression and hopelessness, though.

He had to do something.

He returned to Omega with no credits, and only his gun. He'd decided that he had to do good, regardless of his own life, regardless of how he'd felt or was feeling, regardless of what he'd lost. He couldn't let the other 11 members of his team know that he wasn't honoring what they'd went through. Even though he lacked the will, or the effort, he managed to get his way to Omega, setting out to do some good.

Disrupting the local gang and mercenary group's activities became his main focus, Omega was a scary place, kids growing up there were almost destined for a life of crime, or finding themselves laying in dark alleys at night, begging for a few credits to feed their red sand addiction.

He was making amazing progress, really pissing off the mercenary group leaders to the point where they had all put aside their differences and came together for once to actually attempt to take him down. As he continued trying to make Omega that little bit better, he felt something about himself, like his life was starting to come together again, even though he knew he was going to get himself killed doing so.

Then everything came to a halt when he found Shepard alive, and wanting to recruit him for another mission. Everything suddenly fell into place, and it was like the past 2 years hadn't happened, that it was still two weeks after they had defeated Sovereign. As badly as Garrus wished it was, though, it wasn't. Shepard had died, that was a cold, hard fact. But he'd come back now, and even though he wore the Cerberus logo with indifference, Garrus agreed, and knew what had to be done.

For a while, it seemed like he'd forgotten the past two years, until he got a message about Sidonis, and how he'd disappeared. He hesitated even telling Shepard, but he'd just suffered a hard reality check, and realized that the past two years were more real than ever, he'd lost 11 members of his team, and had to finish what Sidonis started so long ago.

Garrus sighed as he recalled all of these memories, it burned, but it was over now. He couldn't describe the feeling he had when he saw Sidonis down the sights of his scope. He hesitated to pull the trigger, but Shepard had him blocked. Anger, fury, and rage coursed through his veins, and the 10 seconds it took Shepard before he moved out of the way were the longest he'd ever been through. After he told Shepard to move out of the way over his headset, Sidonis spotted him and turned, trying to run. Just like before, he tried to run, but Garrus made sure the back of the Turian's skill was impaled with a single shot, and in a split second, the last two years came to close, and suddenly he had his life back. He'd gained redemption for the 11 members of his team who had been dead for two years. Finally, Garrus was at peace, focused, and able to let go.

Garrus stood up, having recalled the whole last few years in a matter of about an hour had taken quite a toll on him, but he was focused. The Collectors had hell to pay and had to be stopped. Suddenly, EDI popped up behind him. He turned, and nodded.

"Garrus, please report to the main bridge, we've arrived at the Omega-4 relay." The very convincing artificial intelligence said.

"Copy that, on my way." He replied, before picking up his sniper rifle off of one of the crates.

He knew there was no guarantee he'd come home, he knew the risks this presented, the danger, the potential death of the entire crew. But he was fine with that, Shepard trusted the crew, and he trusted Shepard. He cocked his sniper rifle, and exited the main battery room, ready to follow Shepard into the fire.

He had no regrets.


End file.
